People v. AmazonFresh - Who put the cookies in my cart?
~ Confessions of an online shopper ~
When it comes to buying online, I am a self-proclaimed aficionado. My husband would argue, “oniomaniac,” based solely on the sheer number of boxes that the poor UPS driver has to schlep to our porch every day.
Spending no more than average; however, it is instead my resoluteness to “go shopping” exclusively from the comfort of my home, with a dog to pat at whim and a Real Housewife on in the background, that causes one to take note of my mastery of e-commerce.
When I say, “I purchase everything online,” I mean: EVERYTHING. Dog Food. Books, Movies, & Music. Office & Cleaning Supplies. Clothes. Furniture. I have been known to press “order” for a single birthday card, a set of .99 cent mouse traps or a 3-pack of standard white Hanes t-shirts.
For years I have coveted those within Peapod’s delivery area, forced to rely on my husband’s ability to accurately pick-out the correct bakery loaf or plump, but not too plump, plum, from the local grocery store. That was until I discovered:
Despite an avid [and satisfied] Amazon consumer, I was skeptical of its promise to: “deliver fresh produce right to your doorstep.” In what shape would my Bosc Pear [Qty-1] be? Bruised by rushed packaging? Bowling-ball hard? Unappealingly deformed, selected out of necessity, by disinterested hands? And don’t get me started on my concerns for the ice cream.
Henceforward, in self-abnegation and for the good of the team, I proceeded with my AmazonFresh Trial.
First and most impressive, was Amazon’s speed in which it prepared, packaged, and delivered the order. Despite the promise of delivery between 7:00 AM – 10:00 AM [the following day], Amazon gives you until 9:30 PM [the night before] to order. Let me not forget to mention that the delivery day was a Sunday!
I placed my order on Saturday at 12:21 PM. Then, proceeded to add items throughout the day, right up to the cut-off time: 9:30 PM.
Delivery [via USPS] was right on schedule: 9:24 AM
Shipping & Handling
Large, non-perishable items [paper towels, 12-pk of soda] came room-temperature and unpackaged. All other items were packaged in a signature-green, insulated tote, grouped [for the most part] according to product durability.
Plastic, Glass, & Aluminum: Paper & Delicate :
[Note: pears were not damaged]
Shipping & Handling
Packaging was excessive - many bags
contained only 2 items and each cold bag contained at least 4 large freezer packs.
Quality & Selection
Expiration 1 Month
Signs of None
The available inventories [particularly the local markets] decline as the order deadline approaches [9:30 PM] [Domino Sugar (5lbs bag) was out of stock], but you have the option to postpone your delivery to wait for an item.
Shopping Time Fairly More Than Average
It took some time to dig past the sponsored pages/products, but with some effort, I was able to find all of my brands and all, but 2, of my products. Amazon remembers your preferences, so each order should become more efficient.
Monthly Fee $14.99 [After 30-Day Free Trial]
Shipping Free [Orders over $40]
Products Comparable [often cheaper than local grocery stores]
Quality & Selection
designed to work
much the same as the scratch paper list at home, intermittently added to throughout the week, when the milk runs out or a new recipe inspires you. Yet, unlike paper lists, AmazonFresh suggests inadvertently omitted items, allows you to shop from a previous receipt, and provides automatic updated balances as items are added.
Let me not minimize what brought me here to begin with - the ability to buy groceries in the pre-dawn light, buried beneath an assortment of a) knit, b) faux chinchilla fur, and c) goose down blankets [because one is never enough], with nothing but the melody of a hound's sonorous snore echoing to silence.
It is not until you find yourself back in the supermarket; however, that the convenience of AmazonFresh is palpable. There, you realize that with AmazonFresh there are . . .
No more deviant carts No more cart returns
No more nightmares about this headline . . .
lines. . .
. . . to a lousy finale
Ergo, IN CONCLUSIONS, if, you are in the need of groceries and have either: a) a limited tolerance for conversations which start with: "what kind of fruit is this?" and ends with: "would you like to donate?"; b) have been caught in the store one too many times with only 1 open check-out line; or c) have ever wondered if anyone would notice if you just reached over the seafood counter and wrapped your own fish in paper, THEN AmazonFresh is the only sensible choice for you.